I've known you forever
by Sere Bing
Summary: Mondler standalone, about TOW the fertility test. Lot of sap.


**Okay, I know I still have to update tow the wedding dress etc. ****but I totally wanted to write this. This is set after TOW the fertility test, but before TOW the donor. Standalone, totally mondler. So, obviously, this is the only chapter.**

**Dedicated to Ale again, caus she's the one who told me to do a fanfiction about that episode. **

**Disclaimer: Do you really think someone stupid like me could come up with someone as great as Phoebe Buffay, or Chandler Bing? Well, if you do, you are so wrong. And I obviously don't own the song, since Ronan Keating does.**

_It's amazing h__ow you can speak right to my heart  
Without saying a word, you can light up the dark_

Monica silently stepped in the living room from the bedroom, to find her husband warming some milk. "Hey" she softly said "Don't feel good, hun?"

"No, I just couldn't sleep, I'm fine." He answered, trying to crack a smile.

She went in the kitchen and sat on a chair, slightly brushing his back with the back of her hand.

_Try as I may I could never explain  
What I hear when__ you don't say a thing_

"I'm sorry Mon."

"What?" She asked, looking into his bright blue eyes.

"I'm sorry" He repeated, slowly.

"Sorry? Chandler, what are you apologising for? This is not your fault, honey. It's not like you can do something about it. Because I know that if there was, you would."

"How can you be so sure?"

"I've known you forever Chandler. I know you so well. I know you better than you know yourself, and I'm sure you would do anything to change this. I know you would change the world for anybody, if you could. Don't believe I don't know you're hurt too, but still you're worried about me. I know you'd change that for me, Chandler. Fact is… you can't. That's not your fault, honey."

_The smile on your face l__ets me know that you need me  
There's a truth in your eyes saying you'll never leave me  
The touch of your hand says you'll catch me whenever I fall_

"Okay." He nodded. "Then how come I feel like I screwed up? Again?"

"Chandler, everybody screws up. Everybody. I do too, sometimes. But to screw up, you have to do something wrong, and you did nothing."

"Yeah, I guess you're right"

"I'm always right, sweetie" She joked. "Plus, hey, it's not like we have no choice, right? And it's not like we can't conceive at all." She continued, pouring the warm milk into a mug, handing it to him.

"You think we can do the Phoebe thing?" He asked, sipping.

"I think that could be an option" She nodded "But I'd rather not. I mean, what Phoebe did was great, but I don't think I'd like someone else to carry your child, even if that's mine too."

She got up and hugged him from behind, while he stood next to the counter, lightly kissing his shoulder.

_All day long I can hear people talking out loud_

_But when you hold me near you drown out the crowd_

"This is so not a problem" She said, between kisses. "See, we can't conceive, but you want to. If we could, but you didn't want to, now, **that **would be an actual problem. But we have **options**. There's the donor thing, and there's adoption."

"Right" he replied "Thanks honey."

"You're more than welcome" she muttered, starting to rub circles on his stomach. "Better?"

"A lot." He turned around to face her. "I cannot believe you're handling this so well."

"Believe me, up to half an hour ago, I was destroyed. But seeing you miserable kind of helped, you know?"

"Thanks honey, that's so sweet!" He mocked.

"No, it's what I said before. It showed how much you wanted a baby. It showed you actually **cared** about being a father. It's not just that you were ready to be one: you actually **wanted** to. I know you had already told me you wanted to have a baby, but that's just… different."

"I guess I know what you mean. It's so weird, you know? Remember when we had just gotten engaged, and I went on about the house and the four babies? See, I always gave for granted that we could do that. I always thought maybe we would've needed time, but that eventually we would've started trying, and we would've had a baby. It seems just so stupid, right now."

"Chandler, this is not stupid. Of course you thought that, I thought that too. How could we know? I mean, that is like it works for most people. It happened to us, but it could have happened to anybody. And we can't do anything about it."

He hugged her tightly, and kissed her hair. "Do you think there's a reason for everything? You know, that karma thing Phoebe always talks about. You know, when she talks about that meant to be stuff nobody ever believes in. Maybe it is true."

"According to Phoebe I should be married to some guy who actually wanted to live in a house made of cheese. _And_ according to Phoebe, you and I tried to take Joey a couple of years ago. _And_ according to Phoebe we are going to divorce after our seventh wedding anniversary. _And_ according to Phoebe neither evolution nor gravity exist."

"Yeah, I kind of see your point." He answered, laughing. "You are right. I'm sorry."

"That's okay. We're both a little shocked, neither of us saw this coming. I guess we both thought we could just go to the clinic, they would've told us everything was fine and we could go back trying, knowing that eventually it would work."

"Yeah, I guess so." He said.

"Wanna go to bed? We can figure this out in the morning, I'm really tired right now."

He kissed her forehead. "Okay, let's go" He said, putting his arm behind her shoulders. "There's a lot of time to figure this out."

**So, that would be it. Rocks? Sucks? You think I should never be allowed to write a fanfiction again? Whatever you think, you can totally write it in a review.**

**And also, remember I'm Italian, so if there's some mistake, let me know **


End file.
